Happy first Saturday of December, New Zealand! When you’ve finished your nine litres of beer, a swim is a great way to wash off the vom. Just sayin! #stayclassynz

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Dec 1, 2017 at 4:21pm PST

 

I like my chances here – dudes, drink and dumbassery. Someone pass the 🍿#iseedeadpeople

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Dec 11, 2017 at 12:04am PST

 

This next song goes out to the all stupid people. You’re not smart enough to know who you are, but that’s ok. You’ll realise about halfway down, when a tiny stupid voice in your head says, “Er… Did I check for logs? Derp.” No, you didn’t, you beautiful fool.

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Nov 21, 2017 at 9:25pm PST

 

Want to be more zen with your drowning? 😌Just go with the flow. Find a calm spot in the surf and ride that rip all the way out to sea. #beonewiththedumb

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Nov 14, 2017 at 5:03pm PST

 

Halloween 🙄 Same deal every year – you all wanna be me. Get your own damn look! Don’t see me dressing up as yo’ ass… "Ooh look, I’m a people. I have skin on my bones and water in my lungs makes me die”. 😂😂😂 Weak. #bitchstolemylook - - - - #swimreaper #grimreaper #halloween #trickortreat #eyecandy #sexyreapercostume #halloweencostume #halloweenmakeup #picoftheday #dead #beach #pumpkinspicelatte

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Oct 30, 2017 at 9:23pm PDT

 

Thanks for nothing, NZ. I’ll be back, but you guys better up your dumbness game in the meantime. Laters haters! 🖕 #imnotmad #justdisappointed #byefelicia #micdrop

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Mar 5, 2017 at 12:57pm PST

 

Tubing ain’t that exciting, so I filled these ones with concrete. Who wants a hoon? 😂

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Feb 18, 2017 at 10:13pm PST

 

Just like the movie, plenty of dumb happens in twilight. #vampiresdontsparkle ✨⠀

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Feb 13, 2017 at 8:27pm PST

 

This new sign is working a treat! People are so gullible #alternativefacts #posttruth #makedrowninggreatagain

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Jan 30, 2017 at 8:27pm PST

 

Got all my ducks in a row... now just waiting to see some skulls quack. Ha ha! #dosomebombs #givenoducks

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Jan 14, 2017 at 8:23pm PST

 

Waiting on some screwups at the river. Anyone know stairway to heaven? 🎵 ⠀ -⠀ -⠀ -⠀ -⠀ -⠀ -⠀ #swimreaper #grimreaper #summer #lovesummer #nzsummer #babeofsummer #hot #sun #swimming #picoftheday #river #lake #singstar #muso

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Jan 8, 2017 at 7:37pm PST

 

A centred reaper is an effective reaper. Inhale water. Exhale water. #fitspo⠀ -⠀ -⠀ -⠀ -⠀ -⠀ -⠀ #swimreaper #grimreaper #summer #lovesummer #nzsummer #babeofsummer #hot #sun #swimming #picoftheday #beach #beachyoga #yoga #yogireaper

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Jan 5, 2017 at 12:55am PST

 

Be mine. Forever. #followme #truelove #skuxdeluxecheeseburger⠀ -⠀ -⠀ -⠀ -⠀ -⠀ #swimreaper #grimreaper #summer #lovesummer #nzsummer #babesofsummer #hot #sun #swimming #picoftheday #beach #love #waves⠀

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Dec 18, 2016 at 8:13pm PST

 

TLC are all like ‘don’t go chasing waterfalls’ but I’m like ‘Jump off them! Don’t check under the water first!' - - - - - #swimreaper #grimreaper #summer #lovesummer #nzsummer #babeofsummer #hot #sun #swimming #picoftheday #waterfall #chasingwaterfalls

A post shared by The Swim Reaper (@iamtheswimreaper) on Dec 18, 2016 at 5:46pm PST