Svađate se s partnerom u izolaciji? Pravilo od pet minuta moglo bi vam spasiti vezu

J.Mi

19:34, 04. travnja 2020.

Svađate se s partnerom u izolaciji? Pravilo od pet minuta moglo bi vam spasiti vezu — Screenshot: Youtube/Instagram

KOLIKO god voljeli provoditi vrijeme sa svojim partnerom, nikom nije lako biti zatvoren u kući pa nervoza često izbija u obliku svađa.

Ako se i vi tijekom izolacije češće svađate s voljenom osobom, u tome bi vam moglo pomoći pravilo od pet minuta o kojem je na Instagramu progovorila influencerica Grace Hazel koju prati nešto manje od 24 tisuće ljudi.

Tekst se nastavlja ispod oglasa

Radi se o jednostavnoj vježbi komunikacije u kojoj svatko ima pet minuta da kaže kako se osjeća (bez napadanja druge osobe). Grace to naziva "nenasilnom komunikacijom".

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THIS is the most important thing I have ever learnt about relating in relationships. Concious and Non Violent Communication ✌🏼: PART TWO. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Quite a few of you were up for finding out more about this.. The other day I read an article named "hilarious things I've learnt about my partner since working from home during isolation". Folks were having all sorts of insights, like finding out their significant other is a "just to clarify" guy or "let's circle it back" kinda person. But what if actually all this lock down malarkey is bringing all sorts of deep, uncomfortable shade around your relationship to surface? What tools can you adopt to keep the peace, love present? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Concious and Non Violent Communication, that's what. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ So what is Non Violent Communication? I've pulled some great stuff from an article on lifelessons.com, written by Michael Frank. It interviews Alan Seid who explains it way better than my frazzled lil brain can in the midst of 30 degree Indian heat in. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Here is is... ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ "Non Violent Communication is about how we express our honesty in such a way that our perspective is most likely to be received with understanding, and our needs are most likely to be met in a way that’s in harmony with other people’s needs. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ On the listening side it’s about how we receive what might be coming at us, even when it sounds like an attack or blame or criticism or a judgment, and how we listen for the other person’s needs and values so that we’re standing in a more compassionate place, so that we’re less likely to get defensive, and most likely to diffuse a potential conflict." ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Back to my feels.. If something is bothering you, instead of shouting "oi, you bloody idiot, I hate it when you >>insert thing that absolutely fucks you off here<<, it makes me so mad". Instead, take a moment to breathe and gather yourself. Ask your partner if now is a good time and say that you'd like to express something tender to them. Use the phrases from the 2nd image of this post (by Marshall. B. Rosenburg) to support yourself to communicate and listen. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ (MORE BELOW IN COMMENTS)

A post shared by Sexual Healing Coach (@grace___hazel) on Apr 1, 2020 at 2:17am PDT

"Ako nešto želite riješiti, pokušajte postaviti alarm na pet minuta od trenutka kad ste uzeli riječ. U tih pet minuta recite svoje argumente, pri čemu je drugoj osobi zabranjeno da vas prekida, verbalno ili izrazima lica. Nakon što vaših pet minuta istekne, osoba koja je slušala ima pet minuta da vam objasni što je ona čula od toga što ste rekli. Nakon toga, partner dobiva svojih pet minuta da kaže što misli", napisala je Grace.

Objasnila je da na taj način možete "nenasilno" pregovarati, izmjenjujući uloge svakih pet minuta, sve dok ne dođete do točke gdje ste se složili.

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